


Prison Break: The Musical Remake

by kitami



Category: Prison Break
Genre: Comedy, Crack, Multi, Musicals, Not Canon Compliant
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:55:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 2,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27759481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kitami/pseuds/kitami
Summary: well not really, just songs rewritten to match prison break, lol.
Relationships: Fox River 8/Fox River 8
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	1. We Didn't Start the Fire (Billy Joel)

**Author's Note:**

> Original: We Didn't Start the Fire by Billy Joel

**We Didn’t Start the Fire**

**[VERSE 1]**

Brad Bellick, the C.O, Henry Pope owns the pound

Big shot, Michael Scofield, has blueprint tattoos

Scylla, what a war, Michael and his brother Linc

Teddy Bear, what a racist and a rapist

Alex and Felicia Lang, works for the F.B.I

Ben Franklin, soldier, Abruzzi, mafia guy

Prison Cat, Marilyn, Tweener, Sucre, I love you!

Hey Convicts, here we go, everyone assemble!

**[CHORUS]**

We didn't start the fire

It was always burnin' since the world's been turnin'

We didn't start the fire

But when we are gone

It will still burn on, and on, and on, and on and on...

We didn't start the fire

**[VERSE 2]**

D.B Cooper, Bill Kim, Susan, Debra

Nick Savrinn, LJ, Veronica

Battle for custody, all locked up in Sona

Whistler, Lechero and best girl Sofia

**[VERSE 3]**

Tancredi, Posiedon, Kellerman is back again

Maytag, Sid and Ja, “Just have a little faith.”

Wyatt, Gretchen, Donald Self, agents from the Bureau

President Reynolds, her brother Steadman

Christina, General, All they want is the Scylla 

Kaniel Outis in Yemen, David, Omar and Lincoln

Michael Scofield, Linc the Sink, been running longer, further, faster

Fox River, Sona, Ogygia, I can’t take it anymore!

**[CHORUS]**

We didn't start the fire

It was always burnin' since the world's been turnin'

We didn't start the fire

But when we are gone

It will still burn on, and on, and on, and on and on...

We didn't start the fire


	2. Anybody Have a Map? (D.E.H)

**Anybody Have a Map?**

**[MICHAEL]**

Have you been drawing those maps to yourself? “Hey future Mike, here's a map to find some Legos!”

**[MIKE]**

I started one.

**[MICHAEL]**

Those maps are important, honey. They're gonna help you build your intelligence.

**[MIKE]**

I guess.

**[MICHAEL]**

Can we try to have an optimistic outlook, huh?

Can we buck up just enough to see the world won't fall apart?

Maybe this year, we decide

We're not giving up before we've tried

This year, we make a new start

**[MICHAEL]**

Hey! I know! You can go around today and ask the other kids to try out your map. How 'bout that?

**[MIKE]**

Perfect.

**[MICHAEL]**

I'm proud of you already.

**[MIKE]**

Oh, good...

**[MICHAEL]**

Another stellar conversation for the scrapbook

Another stumble as I'm reaching for the right thing to say

I'm kinda coming up empty

Can't find my way to you

Does anybody have a map?

Anybody maybe happen to know how the hell to do this?

I don't know if you can tell

But this is me just pretending to know

So where's the map?

I need a clue

'Cause the scary truth is

For the first time,

I’ve never been so clueless before

**[LINCOLN]**

It's your senior year, LJ. You are not missing the first day.

**[LJ]**

I already said I'd go tomorrow.

**[LISA]**

He doesn't listen. Look at him, he's probably high.

**[VERONICA]**

He's definitely high.

**[LINCOLN]**

I don't want you going to school high, LJ.

**[LJ]**

Perfect, so then I won't go. Thanks, Dad!

**[LINCOLN]**

Another masterful attempt ends with disaster

**[LISA]**

Interstate's already jammed.

**[LINCOLN]**

Pour another cup of coffee

And watch it all crash and burn

**[VERONICA]**

LJ finished the milk!

**[LINCOLN]**

It's a puzzle, it's a maze

I tried to steer through it a million ways

But each day's another wrong turn

**[LISA]**

I better head out.

**[VERONICA]**

If LJ’s not ready, I'm leaving without him.

**[LINCOLN]**

Does anybody have a map?

Anybody maybe..

**[MICHAEL]**

Anybody have a map?

**[BOTH]**

..happen to know how the hell to do this?

I don't know if you can tell

But this is me just pretending to know

**[MICHAEL]**

So where's the map?

**[LINCOLN]**

I need a clue

**[BOTH]**

'Cause the scary truth is

**[LINCOLN]**

I'm flying blind

I'm flying blind

**[MICHAEL]**

I'm flying blind

I'm flying..

**[BOTH]**

I'm flying blind

And I'm making this up as I go

As I go


	3. The Prison Bunch (Marvel Bunch)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok, marvel bunch but its prison break.

**[Fox River]**

Here's the story

Of a prison breakout

Who was orchestrated by Michael Scofield

**[HENRY POPE]**

To break out his brother

**[BELLICK]**

And some others

**[KELLERMAN]**

It ended in minefields

**[MICHAEL]**

I did it all 

My name’s Michael Scofield 

I’m the  _ smartest _ , to ever walk the Earth (by far)

**[SUCRE]**

Fernando Sucre

**[T-BAG]**

Theodore Bagwell 

**[SARA]**

And Sara Tancredi

**[ALL]**

So then one day all the convicts were assembled

To fight a lawman who packed much more than a punch

And this group

Was labeled the Fox Rivers

That's the way we all became the Prison Bunch

**[CHORUS]**

The Prison Bunch

The Prison Bunch

That's the way we became the Prison Bunch

**[TWEENER]**

Oh, hey guys!

**[MAHONE]**

Shut up


	4. Ex-Cons (Ex-Wives)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I started from 'Divorced, My name is Catharine of Aragon'.

**Ex-Cons**

**[ALL]**

Rapist

**[T-BAG]**

They don’t call me Theodore

Was sentence 25 years, for bein’ a whore

Im’a creep, won't get sleep cause I’m causin’ war

So if you try to shank me

You won't try that again

**[ALL]**

Betweener

**[TWEENER]**

I'm that Boston Boy

And I'm up next, see

I stole a baseball card

Yeah, I'm that slippery

Why did I drop down dead?

Well I could be inbred

But all I see is red!

**[ALL]**

Died

**[WESTMORELAND]**

Westmoreland, the only one who didn’t escape

**[ALL]**

Oops

**[WESTMORELAND]**

When my daughter was diagnosed

I died, but I'm not what I seem

Or am I?

Stick around and you'll

Suddenly see more...

**[ALL]**

Mob Boss

**[ABRUZZI]**

Dov'è Fíbonaćci?

**[ALL]**

Chí?

**[ABRUZZI]**

Back in Chicago I was the Don

**[ALL]**

Sí

**[ABRUZZI]**

But I wasn’t as careful

As I should have been

Ended in me sitting in cells

Next to a drug addict 

**[MAHONE]**

Prick up your ears, I'm the agent

Who lost his son

**[ALL]**

F.B.I

**[MAHONE]**

Agent of the Bureau, catch all the cons, I’d

Lock up your husbands

Lock up your sons

The agent is here

You all better run

**[ALL]**

Survived

**[MICHAEL]**

Five down, I'm the final one

I brought them to the end of their lives

I'm the survivor, Michael Scofield

I bet you wanna know how I got this far

I said I bet you wanna know

How we got this far

**[ALL]**

Do you wanna know how we got this far?


	5. Evidence to Expose (Love is an Open Door)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idc what y'all say savrinn and veronica will forever be lawyer bros

**Evidence to Expose**

**[VERONICA]**

Okay, can I just ask a big favour?

**[SAVRINN]**

Well, it depends.

**[VERONICA]**

So my ex-boyfriend Lincoln Burrows was put on death row 

And I was hoping that you could help out?

**[SAVRINN]**

That’s my realm of expertise!

'Cause like

My father was innocent and framed for a crime

So he's a free man now or so I believe

**[VERONICA]**

So will you…

**[SAVRINN]**

Just for you

**[SAVRINN]**

I’ll do the case…

**[VERONICA]**

We’ll win the case...

**[BOTH]**

We can prove the innocence of Burrows!

Evidence to expose!

Evidence to expose!

Evidence to expose!

**[VERONICA]**

With you!

**[SAVRINN]**

With you!

**[VERONICA]**

With you!

**[SAVRINN]**

With you!

**[BOTH]**

Death rows to oppose...

**[SAVRINN]**

I mean it's crazy...

**[VERONICA]**

What?

**[SAVRINN]**

Burrow’s actually- 

**[VERONICA]**

Innocent!

**[SAVRINN]**

T-That's what I was gonna say!

**[VERONICA]**

I've never met someone-

**[BOTH]**

Who thinks so much like me!

Jinx! Jinx again!

Our mental synchronization

Can have but one explanation

**[SAVRINN]**

You-

**[VERONICA]**

And I-

**[SAVRINN]**

Were-

**[VERONICA]**

Meant-

**[BOTH]**

To foresee!

**[VERONICA]**

Free the man...

**[SAVRINN]**

Free the man...

**[BOTH]**

Whose name’s Lincoln Burrows

He’s nothing but an innocent man!

Extend his lifespan!

Extend his lifespan!

Life can be so much more! 

**[VERONICA]**

For him!

**[SAVRINN]**

For him!

**[VERONICA]**

For him!

**[SAVRINN]**

For him!

**[BOTH]**

Work for the law...

**[SAVRINN]**

Can I plan something crazy?

**[VERONICA]**

_ [giggles] _

**[SAVRINN]**

Shall we go to court?

**[VERONICA]**

Can I say something even crazier? Yes!


	6. Meet the Plastics (Mean Girls)

**Meet The Plastics**

**[MICHAEL, spoken]**

Woah. Who’s at that table over there?

**[SUCRE, spoken]**

Don't look at them, just don't!

**[SUCRE, sung]**

Those 3 run Fox River

They even spook the guards

**[DARWIN, sung]**

They play their little mind games

All around the courtyard

**[SUCRE, sung]**

They might insult your status

Or make fun of your game

**[DARWIN, sung]**

Like they bashed Brad Bellick

'Til he burst into flame

**[SUCRE, spoken]**

And Brad Bellick was a C.O

**[DARWIN, spoken]**

John Abruzzi is the mob boss

He calls all the shots

He always runs the P.I

We're just drones that work for him, then die

**[ABRUZZI, sung]**

My name is John Abruzzi

And I am a massive deal

Fear me, hate me

Stand and stare at me

I want Fibonacci

I've got money and crooks

I am, like, drunk with power

This prison

Humps my leg like a chihuahua

I'm the meanest mafia you've ever seen

I’ve been running the gang since nineteen 

Abruzzi runs P.I

And I am a mafia boss

I don't care who you are

I don't care how you feel

**[DARWIN, spoken]**

That is T-Bag, raped and murdered 6 students in ‘bama

**[SUCRE, spoken]**

And it wasn’t always in that order.

**[T-BAG, sung]**

Yes, permission

No, permission

There is no difference

I spend making sure that

I can stay in power

If Abruzzi is the sun

Then you better just run

'Cause I own and wear the crown

Watch Abruzzi die down

I’ll drug your beverage

And make you call me your master

Then you’ll hold my pocket to avoid any disaster!

**[SUCRE, DARWIN]**

Disaster!

**[T-BAG]**

Abruzzi is the boss

But I'm the one that holds the crown

I am the King of Fox River

**[SUCRE, DARWIN]**

Like a North Korean leader

**[DARWIN, spoken]**

That is Charles Patoshik

The craziest person you will ever meet

**[SUCRE, spoken]**

Sentenced 60 years for murdering his parents.

**[HAYWIRE, sung]**

My name is Haywire

My hair is shiny

My art is perfect

I don’t want money

Wanna go to Holland

With my pal Larry

My name is Haywire

I may not be sane...

That's it.


	7. The Other Side (Greatest Showman)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that one scene.

**he Other Side**

**[MAHONE]**

Right here, right now

I put the offer out

I don't wanna chase you down

I know you see it

You work for me

And I can cut you free

Out of the drudgery and walls you keep in

So trade that dangerous for something typical

And if it's risky, live a little risky

You can play it sensible, a man of his family

Or you can risk it all and see

Don't you wanna get away from the same con part you gotta play?

'Cause I got what you need

So come with me and take my side

You won't ever need to hide

'Cause you can run like cons do

Or you can work for me

Stay in the cage, or you finally take the key

Oh, damn! Suddenly you're free to fly

Nobody else will need to die

**[DARWIN]**

Okay, Mahone, you wanna cut me in

Well, I hate to tell you, but it just won't happen

So thanks, but no

I think I'm good to go

'Cause I quite enjoy being a loyal acquaintance 

Now I admire you, and your law-like voodoo

You're on to something, really it's something

I’ll just keep on the run, and the military stays loyal

I won't leave that up to you

Don't you know that I'ma soldier who’s loyal to the day I die

'Cause I got what I need and I don't wanna take the ride

I don't need to see the other side

So go and do like you do

I'm good to do like me

Ain't in a cage, so I don't need to take the key

Oh, damn! Can't you see I'm doing fine?

I don't need to see the other side

**[MAHONE]**

Now is this really how you'd like to spend your days?

Your little princess is sick, don't put it on delay

**[DARWIN]**

If I hadn’t broken out, my family would then frown

Disgraced and disowned, another one of the clowns

**[MAHONE]**

But you would finally live a little, finally laugh a little

Just let me give you the freedom to dream and it'll

Wake you up and cure your aching

Take your walls and start 'em breaking

Now that's a deal that seems worth taking

But I guess I'll leave that up to you

**[DARWIN]**

Well, it's intriguing, but to go would cost me greatly

So what will I get in exchange for getting Scofield? 

**[MAHONE]**

Fair enough, you'd want a piece from all the action

Supply of medicine, we could shake and make it happen

**[DARWIN]**

I wasn't born this morning, safety would be just fine

**[MAHONE]**

Why not just go ahead and ask for witness protection?

**[DARWIN]**

Mahone,

**[MAHONE]**

Testify?

**[DARWIN]**

Okay..

**[MAHONE]**

Immunity?

**[DARWIN]**

Fine.

**[MAHONE & DARWIN]**

Don't you wanna get away to a whole new part you're gonna play

'Cause I got what you need, so come with me and take the ride

To the other side

So if you do like I do

So if you do like me

Forget the cage, 'cause we know how to make the key

Oh, damn! Suddenly we're free to fly

We're going to the other side

So if you do like I do

(To the other side)

So if you do like me

(We're going to the other side)

'Cause if we do we're going to the other side

We're going to the other side


	8. Some Things Never Change (Frozen II)

**Some Things Never Changed**

**[T-BAG]**

Sure, the cells roar a little bit louder

And we're all getting older

And the sky begins to weep in harsh rocky hail 

So expect Scofield’s mean ol’ cold shoulders 

**[HAYWIRE]**

Just like how he won’t let me see his tattoos

**[T-BAG]**

That's why I rely on opportunities

Yes, some things never change

Like the tugging on my pocket

Some things stay the same

**[T-BAG AND HAYWIRE]**

Like how we get along just fine

**[T-BAG]**

Like an old stone wall that'll never fall

Some things are always true

Some things never change

Like how I rely on Scofield 

**[SUCRE]**

The leaves are already falling

C, it feels like the future is calling

**[DARWIN]**

Are you telling me tonight you're gonna get down on one knee?

**[SUCRE]**

Yeah, but I'm really bad at planning these things out

Like candlelight and pulling of rings out

**[DARWIN]**

Maybe you should leave all the romantic stuff to me

**[SUCRE]**

Yeah, some things never change

Like the love that I feel for her

Some things stay the same

Like how cellies are easier

But if I commit and I go for it

I'll know what to say and do

Right?!

**[DARWIN]**

Some things never change

**[SUCRE]**

C, the pressure is all on you

**[LINCOLN]**

The winds are restless 

Could that be why I'm hearing this call?

Is Michael coming?

I'm not sure if I have much to live for

These days are precious

Can't let him slip away

I can't freeze this moment

But I can still go out and seize this day

**[T-BAG]**

The cells roar a little bit louder

**[HAYWIRE]**

And you all look a little bit older

**[ABRUZZI]**

It's time to count our blessings

**[DARWIN AND SUCRE]**

Beneath an autumn sky

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i ended it early.


	9. Satisfied (Hamilton)

**Satisfied**

**[MANCHE]**

Alright, alright. That's what I'm talkin' about!

Everyone give it up for the matron of honor

Fernando Sucre!

**[SUCRE (all men) {all women}:]**

A toast to the groom!

(To the groom!)

(To the groom!)

{(To the groom!)}

To the bride!

{To the bride!}

(To the bride!)

{To the bride!}

From your cousin

(Oh Fernando!)

(Oh Fernando!)

{(Oh Fernando!)}

Who is always by your side

(By your side)

{By your side}

To your family

{(To the family!)}

{(To avoid tragedy!)}

And the hope that you provide

(You provide!)

{(You provide!)}

May you always…

{(Always)}

Be satisfied

{(Rewind)}

**[Recorded Samples]**

Rewind, rewind

Helpless, 

Fernando Sucre

Hector

Drownin' in 'em

Drownin', rewind

I remember that night, I just might (rewind)

I remember that night, I just might (rewind)

I remember that night, I remember that

**[SUCRE]**

I remember that night, I just might

Regret that night for the rest of my days

I remember that liquor store

That I robbed just to go on a date

I remember that dreamlike dress you wore

Like a dream that you can't quite place

But Maricruz, I'll never forget the first time I saw your face

I have never been the same

Intelligent eyes in a hunger-pang frame

And when you said, "Hi," I forgot my dang name

Set my heart aflame, every part aflame

**[COMPANY]**

This is not a game…

**[HECTOR]**

You strike me as a woman who has never been satisfied

**[MARICRUZ]**

I'm sure I don't know what you mean

You forget yourself

**[HECTOR]**

Fernando

Will still be in bars

**[MARICRUZ]**

I know that

**[HECTOR]**

He can’t be there for your child

**[flashback to when they first met lol]**

**[SUCRE]**

My name is Fernando Sucre

**[MARICRUZ]**

Maricruz Delgado

Where's your family from?

**[SUCRE]**

Puerto Rico

There's a million things I’ll do for you

but just you wait, just you wait…


End file.
